One last hill

My knee hurts. I think I'm getting sick. I didn't train enough. It's going to rain. Might be 85 degrees. What if I miss the start? Am I eating the right thing? I'll wear long sleeves. Nope, shorts sleeves. Nope, long sleeves. Will there be wind? I haven't done enough. I've done too much. My ear itches. This show is a rerun.

Running helps clear my mind. It's my therapy. My quiet time. My "sort through the anxiety and daily grind" time. My escape. And with only 6 days to go until the Marathon and in the midst of tapering off, I am running less and stressing more. This is like the one last hill on Hereford St. before making the turn to the finish line in Boston. I have been going out for runs that aren't long enough or hard enough to reap the endorphin, natural healing vibes I need! These feelings will settle in a couple of days, but this week is mentally trying. It's full of emotion, a vivid reminder of why I am running this marathon for Dana-Farber. It's full of gratitude, for the amazing support that has been shown to this cause. It's full of checklists and notes and planning, trying to prepare for a good day. It's full of excitement that 4 or 5 months of training was the hard work, and the payoff is on Monday.

I could have never dreamed we together could reach over $32,000 raised for cancer research in a single year. But I also never could have dreamed what this year would have been like when I signed up to run last October. I don't think anyone could have. But, I still have hope. I still believe, as did Molly and Mary and John, that we can make a difference. We can be the change. We can do this for them. So many people have donated, held events, asked their friends and family for support, shared our story, taken this effort on as their own, and I am incredibly grateful for your support of Dana-Farber and of the Marathon Challenge this year. And we're not finished yet....www.runDFMC.org/2011/jennies.

I am not a cancer survivor. But I am a survivor of cancer and it's far reaching effects. Anyone who has lost a family member is. I would run forever if it could change the way things have been, but instead, I will run 26.2 on Monday to try to change the way things will be. For my family. For my children. For my friends. And for yours.

Be good. Be strong.